Single White Male

I'm fully domesticated. I cook, clean, sew. I've been lovingly (or pityingly?) called a cabana boy on three separate occasions. I'm awesome, yeah?

So where are all the cute, curious girls who like horror movies? Hmmm…

The trouble is archetypally Darwinian. Quite simply, the number of guys looking for cute, curious girls who like horror movies far outnumber the population of cute, curious girls who like horror movies. Therefore we, as the noble peacocks, must compete for attention.

Unfortunately, I'm not outwardly competitive. I know I am better than everyone. Haha. Competition is inherently unnecessary; it contradicts my pragmatic nature.

Oh well.

At least my misfortune provides amusement for others. Welcome to Pop Culture Tragedy. ;(