My allergies know no moderation. I would have taken over the world long ago if it weren't for the constant, jarring interruptions of sneezes.
Nobody likes sneezes,[citation needed] but my brain is particularly hard hit by them. It would seem that puppies and I both suffer from amsneezia, a condition in which the afflicted entity momentarily forgets the all the answers to the w questions (who/what/when/where/why) after sneezing.
Smoking, incidentally, seems to help moderate the frequency of amsneezia attacks. Staying away from cats also helps.
Amsneezia would be cute and silly if it happened infrequently. But every fucking time I sneeze I lose touch with reality.
Such is the tragedy of my life.