All too frequently strangers feel compelled to walk up to me and state the obvious. When a child points to a car and says, “That is a car,” you give them a cookie, or at least a condescending smile. But is that in response to the simplicity of the intellect, or the cartoonish physicality afforded to the young? How is one supposed to treat an adult meatbag exhibiting the same behaviors? Should they be given cookies or beaten mercilessly? And does the proper response change depending on whether or not they address non-relatives as “bro”?