As stated previously, my apartment isn't so much home as it is rest stop for bugs. Maybe not even. My apartment is more a mirage, luring weary hexapedal travelers to their doom. Crickets in the fall, cockroaches in the summer.

While I like to think it is a cozy environment for man and dog, cute girls may not find it so inviting. I can't remember the clever segue I used to broach the subject with Tiffany, but as it turns out, crawly things don't bother her in the slightest. In fact she replied with something like, "There's a mouse that lives in our walls."

What a girl!