Actually, I'm a much better writer than Edward Bulwer-Lytton. Really. You'll just have to trust me, though, as I'm not going to go into any details about the work-in-progress.
So…
In lieu of that, I proffer the following anecdote:
Once upon a time I quit my night job. My letter of resignation was a haiku, neatly centered in the page.
I'm a much better writer than Edward Bulwer-Lytton.